Solo was trying to break into show business, but it wasn’t easy. At 30 years old, the farthest she had gotten so far was as a clown at children’s birthday parties, where she tied balloons into animal shapes, beat herself with nurf-filled socks, and rode a unicycle in reverse for obnoxious rich children and their obnoxious rich parents.
Recently though, she’d been blessed enough be scheduled for an audition to act in Tarantino’s new female empowerment thriller, titled, “Three Amigos Get Tortured: Weinstein, Woody, and Spacey.” The part of the main torturer could be a breakthrough role for Solo.
She had been sent the script and had been practicing for a week straight, using her working actor friends as practice partners. She had the dialogue down pat so she could focus on the body language, expressions, etc. She hopped the bus to the studio.
Solo was nervous but also confident that she would “wow” them. Soon she was called to the stage. She saw the front row filled with faces, bored and waiting. She was given the cue to begin.
“You three lumps of noxious clay, it took me awhile but here you are, bound and gagged in such a delightful way. Now what am I going to <hiccup> <hiccup> <hiccup>
“OK, Miss Solo, that will be all. We will call and let you know if you got the part.”