Before we get to the story, I have to say I had no idea there was an actual place like the one in the story until I went out looking for a graphic.
After having been on several adults-type cruises I decided to change things up and take the family-friendly one for a change. My grandkids lived at the other end of the country and I missed their exuberance when they visited. A 7-day cruise was the next best thing.
I decided to drive down to FL to get on the Queen Bee. Leaving at 6 a.m., by noon I was ready for a bite to eat. I was ravenous, and when the Beast of Burger billboard, featuring the gorilla, King Kong, on top of a skyscraper and holding a burger, I took the next exit.
Beast of Burger was a combination restaurant and roadside zoo. The lingering olfactory aggravated assault of charcoaled beef and alligator toilet pummeled my nostrils as I walked up the turtle stepping stones to the entrance. Going against my better judgment due to hunger, I pushed the swinging bamboo doors and walked in.
Inside I was greeted with a menu that offered everything from foot of arm of aardvark to zenith of zebra. Keeping it within reason that only made sense in this insanity, I ordered capybara burger and fricaseed rabbit, with sides of cattail root and a watercress salad. The waitress told me it would be a few minutes so I had time to walk the zoo out back.
I stepped through the trail of tall grass and saw critters never seen before. I tried not to see the cook pulling a capybara out of the enclosure as I walked. I heard footsteps behind me, turned, and saw a toddler coming my way. The little guy ran past and directly towards the alligator enclosure, which had a protective screen over it. The little guy, being a toddler, had no concept of danger, so when he started to climb it, I yelled out, “Get off the screen!” He looked at me, hesitated for a moment, then continued to climb up onto the screen and over the water. I ran and grabbed him off of it just as the waiting gator below jumped toward him. Thank goodness he was saved.
I had second thoughts about having lunch at Beast of Burger, and they were OK with canceling the order. As I walked out, the cook was wheeling the still living capybara back to his enclosure.
Once comfy in the car, I got online to see if I could get a refund on my cruise, then called them. They said no refunds, but they could apply the cost to another cruise. I said fine, I would call them soon with a choice to apply the credit to.
I headed back out to the highway and called the grandkids on the drive back home.