Grey skies, leaking rain
intruding wind through
gaps in north’s stone wall.
Returning promise
Wistful eyeball peers through,
remembers a blue velvet box.
Ears imagine a withered heart
whimpering, kept guileless faith
Wind’s moans accuse
Turning away, stumbling
rose petals crushed
under his heels.
Kim from Writing in North Norfolk is today’s host of dVerse. Kim says:
This week I’d like you to take any meaning, form or compound of the word keep, and write a poem of exactly 44 words (not counting your title), including the prompt word.
image: Fortress by Valentin Petrov
Beautiful song Li.
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Sting is a natural poet among other things.
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I think he was to late to break through the walls of the fortress…
or maybe he should have waited for dawn
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Lovely Lisa. Perfect song too.
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Thanks, Linda.
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Thank you for the Sting video, Jade, and for your quadrille about a medieval keep. I like the fragments of story about the blue velvet box and crushed rose petals, which make me want to know more: what is in the box?
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Thank you, Kim. The air of mystery forbids revealing the answer to your question…
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Oh you tease!
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🙂
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I love all these w sounds:
“withered heart
whimpering” and
“Wind’s moans”
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Thanks De!
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Oh my days! What has he done to feel so guilty? Even the wind points a finger! Good write 😊
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Thank you, Vivian 🙂
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😊
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Me thinks our Knight has dallied too long at other keeps, and the princess that was once in the tower, agreed to marry an old rich baron, and got hell out of Dodge.
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Best guess so far, Glenn 😉
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This is absolutely lovely!! ❤️ I too love the “w” sounds in this one 😀
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Thanks so much, Sanaa 🙂
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The first stanza paints a picture and then the rest fills it in. I really like the moody feel. (K)
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Thank you very much for your feedback. Question: you mentioned getting back to the birds in another comment. I know you painted a bird a month but did/do you do other work with birds? I really like the way the ones in your mixed media piece looked.
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I did a bunch of little figures I called birdlings, placing them on different collages usually for different poems. You can see them here:
https://methodtwomadness.wordpress.com/?s=birdlings
I’ve also done this with crows–basically black silhouettes. They’re around here somewhere too. I don’t glue them down, just photo them on different backgrounds, and then put them back in the envelope for the next adventure.
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Very awesome, Kerfe. I just scrolled through quite a few of the birdlings. I may copy you in some sense by choosing a recurring figure/shape to drop in on artwork.
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It’s a good inspiration for a theme I think. Looking forward to what you come up with.
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I was looking over the most visited posts stats and overall any bird post does well. It’s a theme that resonates with a lot of people I guess.
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When I see birds I see hope unless it’s a crow or owl. In any case there is an emotion attached to birds…
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Crows have been good to me. I guess hopeful is not the right description though.
I’m doing an owl Friday for draw a bird day…I know some also see them as bad omens, but I find all birds inspiring.
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I like all birds also and they each inspire in their own ways. Ooh looking forward to Friday now 🙂
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Love this one, Lisa. So… writerly! Nicely done!
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Thank you, Susan 🙂 I feel like I’m getting stuck in a poetic rut and so am going to be trying different things.
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As a reader, it doesn’t seem as though you are in a rut, but I know what you mean. Every so often I feel like I’m repeating myself. That’s when it’s time to do something un-Susan-like. The Kafka nursery rhyme prompt goosed my muse a bit. 🙂
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….and the castle keeps its secrets. Great write.
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Thank you, Beverly 🙂
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I wanted to let you know, when I clicked on your name in Mr. Linky, it took me to “the dVerse pub” instead of your poem….
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This puts a chill of sadness in my heart Lisa — enchanting, as is the image.
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Thank you for reading, Rob and for commenting.
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A wonderful story poem in 44 words, my guess is he lost his love, a blue velvet box could hold a crown.
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Thank you, Truedessa. Good guess!
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I get the sadness and angst from the rose crushed petals.
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Thank you, Grace.
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Lovely verses Li.
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Thank you, Sadje 🙂
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You’re welcome 😉
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A box to hold secrets and memories, that they not be lost, whatever the outcome.
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Yes, Ken.
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Ah, that telling line – crushed under his heels – the the turning away, O!
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😦
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I thought I commented on this one! I am glad I came back to check. An enchanting poem Lisa.
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Thanks much, Toni.
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There is something ominous about the wind coming through the north wall. Nice description.
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Thank you, Frank. Here the west wall is the ominous one but the story needed north.
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Haiku-esque stanzas, and an ironic turn from a romantic expectation! Bravo!
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Frank, thank you for your helpful comments in seeing the poem. Did not think of haiku-esque while writing it, but looking at it again see what you mean 🙂
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