(c) all rights reserved · fiction

What do you see? #18 — A Sense of Purpose

Image Credit; Hoi An- Unsplash

Verti had given the best years of her life to her high pressure career, but at last she was old enough to retire. The last years on the job, when she started counting the days, had been a particularly excruciating form of torture.

But now here she was, no schedules. The first few months had seemed like an extended vacation, which she had never been able to take while working. She was able to get items on her to-do list done. She was able to arrange lunch dates easily as it only depended on the other person’s schedule.

At the six month’s mark, she began to feel some internal pressure to frame a loose schedule for herself. She began exploring groups, special interests, and daily writing to prompts on her blog. The loose schedule eased her mind to a certain extent, but there were still so many hours of nothing to fill in her day, to bring balance.

At the one-year mark, she decided to try to find a part-time, entry-level job near her home. She went on a few interviews and wasn’t offered any positions. After enough rejections, she decided to apply for full-time professional-level jobs that struck her fancy, within a 50-mile radius. Again, she went through some interviews – and again was not offered any of the positions.

At this point, Verti had some choices to make. If she really wanted to fill her open hours with work, she was going to have to start applying for the jobs that would put her back into a pressure cooker. If she decided against that route, she would need to find something to fill more of her time with. She decided to sleep on it.

That night, as most nights, was full of dreams that segued into one another. There were usually plots to them, but some nights a singular image would flash with no linking context. In one of those flashes, Verti saw a bike with a basket on the front and a carrier on the back. Both of them had an odd assortment of items in them.

In the morning Verti remembered the flash and was tasked with interpreting the “letter from home” (a term Jungian psychoanalyst Clarissa Pinkola-Estes calls dreams.) In the analysis, the bike represented a vehicle, or a means to another place. The “useful junk” represented a sense of purpose that was gathered. In Verti’s mind, the flash meant she needed to find a sense of purpose and the rest would fall into place.

The End.

Sadje is the host of What do you see? 

17 thoughts on “What do you see? #18 — A Sense of Purpose

    1. Thank you, Violet. Give yourself a directive before going to sleep to remember them and have pen and paper handy by the bedside. Another way is to think about a specific question you want answered as you’re falling asleep.

      Liked by 2 people

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