“Crucial to finding the way is this: there is no beginning or end.”
–from Jo Harjo’s “A Map to the Next World.”
Gil woke curled in a dark place, lying on her side, hearing the sound of trickling water. Opening her eyes, she felt dried crusted tears breaking loose. Her wrists were bound behind her.
“You’ve been sleeping awhile.”
The nasal, mocking, vaguely familiar voice came from a place above her. She looked up and saw a red surveillance bulb and a speaker.
“Your challenge is to get out of the tunnels. Crucial to finding the way is this: there is no beginning or end.”
“You win,” said Gil.
He was confused. They always cried. They always tried.
She worked the shiv out of the hidden pocket in her shirt sleeve, sawed through the binding, and waited.
Gil heard footsteps echoing.
As he bent over her, she lodged the shiv neatly in his carotid.
She let the sound of water lead her out.
[144 words]
top image: “Dark Cave,” by Jason Chen
Merril is today’s host for dVerse’ Prosery. Merril says:
Write a piece of flash fiction or other prose of up to or exactly 144 words, including the given line.
Spooky!!! What were they doing there? How did she get into this predicament? I want more!!! A chapter two? 144 more words as a prequel? 🙂
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Yes, not a place I’d want to wake up in!
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Lisa,
Loved every sec of this! Fast-paced, suspenseful, twisted villain, clever heroine, mysterious setting, unexpected ending! So when is the movie coming out?! (Just so you know, the link on Mr. Linky doesn’t take us to your post, just the dVerse site. Might want to fix that.)
Pax,
Dora
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Dora, so glad you enjoyed the story. Thank you for letting me know about the link. I have fixed it 🙂
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Oh, wow! This was excellent, Lisa–though creepy. Whoever “he” is–is very creepy, but I like that Gil is smart and prepared. Like Lillian, I want more.
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The creep is dead. Story over 😉 This is more like the final chapter. Glad you liked it, thank you.
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You’re welcome, and good news about the creep. 😀
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Loved this. You really drew me into the story. Will echo others. I want to read more of the story. 😊
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So happy you enjoyed the story, Helene. Thank you!
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These words seem to have occasioned some VERY dark tales here! Methinks evil forces are about.
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And it isn’t even Halloween!
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Very resourceful captive, and a very captivating work for being so short!
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When it’s a matter of life and death you get resourceful or you die. Thanks, TJS!
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Oooohhhhh Gooooood stuff, Lisa!
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Gil is one feisty lady! Great story to include the quote.
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Thank you, Marion. I see your next comment and know this one is from you also.
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Sorry Lisa, didn’t mean to sign myself as anonymous. Don’t know what happened there.🤷♀️
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WP gets that glitch from time to time. No worries.
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The whole piece is brilliant—especially the last line and the way you used the required quote. So good
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Thank you! Such a nice comment.
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Now this is one woman who knows how to take care of herself in every situation! Well done Lisa!
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Thank you, Dwight. It’s a dangerous world out there for women. We have to know how.
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:>)
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Fantastic story telling Li.
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Sadje, thank you 🙂
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You’re welcome my friend
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wow mystery, murder and escape all in only 144 words is super impressive Lisa … yes we all need more please 🙂
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Thanks so much, Kate! Hey, do you know you have your comments turned off on your page? Is that the way you want it?
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Sorry Lisa … am posting less and only leaving one open for comments … then opening the others after most have been by 🙂
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You had me at “You’ve been sleeping awhile.” Excellent storytelling, Li! 👏
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Thank you very much, Fandango.
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I loved this fast paced and action packed flash fiction. I would love to read more!
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Jay, thank you!
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🙂 Loved it 🙂
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Thank you 🙂
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Enjoyed it very much, Li! Brilliant story telling. 🙂
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🙂 so happy you enjoyed it, Kitty. Thank you
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You are welcome, Li. 🙂
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Wow, this was dramatic, Lisa, and a great self-contained story. I’m so pleased Gil made it out!
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Thank you, Ingrid, me too!
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Brutal flash, but of course we wonder how many poor mice were lost in this mad ma ‘s maze. Such a full story with so few words. Wonderful, Lisa.
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Exactly, Karen. Thank you for reading and your thoughtful comment.
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Revenge! Always sweet. (K)
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Knowing he would never kidnap, torture, and kill again, absolutely!
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You write suspense so well! It’s funny that he wanted to play games with her but she was just a little more direct with him. Straight to the carotid! 👏👏
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Thanks, Tricia! Best to get straight to the carotid and live to tell the tale.
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OH MY GOODNESS! Chills for days I think. A huge Wow from me.
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Thanks and glad to have chilled you 🙂
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Yikes…glad it was her and not me as I’m so claustrophobic. Lots of details in this little flash, leaving me wishing for a rewind button to find out why, how, who….?
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Thanks, Mish!
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I love how she knew how to manipulate the manipulator… nothing scares a psychopath more than someone who won’t be manipulated. I wonder how she knew “the vaguely familiar voice”… not a total stranger maybe.
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Great comment, Bjorn, and yes on the voice. I’m sure when he was lying there bleeding out she recognized him.
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This is absolutely riveting! 😀 Good thing that Gil made it out safe and sound in the end. I applaud her level of courage! 💝💝
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Sanaa, thank you very much, she does have a lot of courage.
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Oooft. Goodnight, bad guy!
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Uh huh! No sweet dreams for him.
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Just rewards!!
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For sure!
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I was entranced by this Lisa, and deeply satisfied that the shiv lodged so, his end her beginning.
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Paul thank you. Yes.
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Very welcome Lisa 🙂
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She is not one to be manipulated…good story Lisa
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Thank you, Max. I really like your perspective on the story.
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