dVerse — MTB — Kiss of the Goddess

https://images.fineartamerica.com/images-medium-large-5/the-kiss-mark-stevenson.jpg

Quail from your downward darting kiss
from Siegfried Sassoon’s, The Kiss

quail skitter in yesterday’s green
from under ferny parasols
your face flickers, a cinema,
downward; frayed cellulose reruns
darting confabulation’s myth
kiss me again, again ’til dust

kiss without bed of delusion
darting sparks; myth made manifest
downward wrung, convergence breathes life
your heart’s pulsing, our circuits linked
from felt to ineffable, gods
quail at their gestaltic folly

image: “The Kiss,” by Mark Stevenson

I decided to write the first stanza from front to back and the second from back to front.  I didn’t use 8-line stanzas, but I did use 8-syllable lines.  Thank you, Laura, for this very enjoyable challenge.

Laura is today’s host of dVerse’ Meeting the Bar. Laura says:
Choose ONE of the [below] lines and write a stanza(s) taking each word as the start of each successive line i.e. the first word begins the first line, the second begins the second and so on. Basically, we are taking the horizontal line and making it vertical- its vaguely acrostic and I’m not sure if this form has a given name.

• Since there’s no help, come let us kiss and part
• Shake hands for ever, cancel all our vows
• By freezing passion at its blossoming
• I guard her beauty clean from rust
• Quail from your downward darting kiss

Rules: You must keep the same sequence though you may reverse it
Your poem should preferably  be at least 2 stanzas long
Rhyme is optional but try to stick to the meter of your chosen line
And for those of you who like an extra challenge
Your chosen line will determine a stanza of either  6, 7, 8 or 10 lines which gives you the options of choosing a poetry form to match – see  the Poetry Forms Index
Suggestions: You might want to make it a ‘kiss and make-up’ poem given the day!

 

42 Comments Add yours

  1. I like th8s5 reflecting form, and I really like the film references in the first stanza.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Thank you, Sarah!

      Like

  2. mizuv's avatar Paula Light says:

    Excellent Lisa! 💖

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Thank you, Paula :)

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Wow, this is amazing!

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

          Mary thanks much :)

          Like

  3. rothpoetry's avatar rothpoetry says:

    You did a great job with the prompt Lisa. I love the art piece!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Thanks much, Dwight. I imagine that’s what swirling souls look like.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. rothpoetry's avatar rothpoetry says:

        :>) You are right!

        Liked by 1 person

  4. Jim's avatar Jim says:

    I like your change of meaning of the Word Quail. I had those thoughts also, perhaps a picture of the bird. But I did not.
    Your reversal worked neat, clever!!
    ..

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Jim, thank you!

      Like

  5. Gillena Cox's avatar Gillena Cox says:

    Nice one.
    Thanks for dropping by to read mine

    Much💖love

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Sadje's avatar Sadje says:

    Very good Li.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Thank you, Sadje.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Sadje's avatar Sadje says:

        You’re welcome my dear friend

        Liked by 1 person

  7. memadtwo's avatar memadtwo says:

    What a beautiful piece of art and your words illuminate it. I particularly like the second stanza. (K)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Kerfe, thank you. I really hope there is a way for soul mates to reconnect it their next lives. What do you think about it?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. memadtwo's avatar memadtwo says:

        I’ve actually written something kind of on the subject for the next Kick-About. I think spirits survive but relationships in this life are rarely that clear. Don’t the Buddhists believe that you keep working on the relationships from your past lives? But the troubled ones, to make them better. I’d like to believe in reincarnation, but I’m not sure. I’ve certainly never had what I would call a soul mate. But I’ve had plenty of troubled relationships.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

          Thanks for your thoughts on it, Kerfe.

          Liked by 1 person

  8. I love what you did here, Li! “ferny parasols” is awesome and the contrast between the two stanzas so palpable. ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Punam, thanks very much and glad to hear that the living and afterlife stanzas were distinct.

      Like

  9. Rob Kistner's avatar Rob Kistner says:

    Wonderful piece Lisa, and your inversion is most effective! 👍🏼✌🏼

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Thank you, Rob!

      Like

  10. kim881's avatar kim881 says:

    The first to jump out at me were the skittering quail – an inspired change of meaning, Lisa! I love the mirrored verses and the ‘frayed cellulose reruns’.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Kim thank you very much. As I look at it, it feels like the living stanza feels false and the beyond stanza feels real.

      Liked by 1 person

  11. this poem was like a dance – a swirl of lovely words and good to see how the line prompt worked in reverse
    “kiss without bed of delusion” – delicious!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Laura, thank you so much. That is my favorite line also :)

      Like

  12. Dora's avatar dorahak says:

    A myriad of images and sensations pulsing with life — I loved it.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Dora, thank you!

      Like

  13. Mish's avatar Mish says:

    Captivating in word choices and imagery. I especially love “from under ferny parasols your face flickers” and your two takes on “Quail”.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Mish thank you and glad you enjoyed.

      Like

  14. I loved the graphic you chose for your poem Lisa. It was a perfect match for your flowing, fluttering words. Beautiful ☺️

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Christine, thank you <3

      Liked by 1 person

  15. Sunra Rainz's avatar Sunra Rainz says:

    Love the combination of the image and your poem; such a sensory write. Love these lines:

    “your face flickers, a cinema,
    downward; frayed cellulose reruns”

    “your heart’s pulsing, our circuits linked”

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Thank you for your lovely comment, Sunra.

      Liked by 1 person

  16. leyderyan's avatar Leyde Ryan says:

    There’s so much that’s good in this that it’s hard to choose a favorite line…I’ll just tell you it thrilled me that you used the word parasols! It’s a wonderful word, and offers a lovely visual.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Happy you enjoyed the poem, Leyde, thank you :)

      Liked by 1 person

      1. leyderyan's avatar Leyde Ryan says:

        You’re welcome–my pleasure!

        Liked by 1 person

  17. The film as a metaphor is so good, and I do love the reflected form.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Thank you very much, Bjorn <3

      Like

  18. Margaret Schaff Bednar's avatar Margaret Schaff Bednar says:

    kiss me again, indeed! I like how you flipped the order!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Thank you, Margaret, and glad you enjoyed it.

      Like

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