this, our living dream
we huddled ones without a home?
flocking, schooling, living rainbows.
back then
sweet with their secrets
of touch and time
“We’ve been waiting for you. What took you so long?”
We may never know
parents weep at grave
to death’s fragrant song
doom’s dissonant stay
No more poem to write today
Top image: photograph titled, “Little Lamb Sculpture,” by MM Anderson
I chose the 13 last lines from the last 13 poems I wrote. One of the lines is the title.
Laura is today’s host of dVerse’ Meet the Bar. Laura gives us two options and I chose this one:
– take the very last/final line from each of your most recent poems and re-write them as a poem
– choose at least 12 poems (since it is the 12th month!)
– keep each line intact, unadulterated
– you may add preposition, conjunction or change of tense if it helps the flow
– you may use enjambment to break a line
– the lines do not have to follow date order
That last part with the parents at a childer’s grave… I can understand that there are no more poems.
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Thanks, Bjorn.
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a sadly sweet joy to read Lisa not least:
“back then
sweet with their secrets
of touch and time”
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Thank you, Laura.
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Oh my heart this is so poignant ~
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❤
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The last stanza is so powerful!
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Thank you.
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That second stanza is delectable! The final stanza…more negative and very powerful!
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Lillian, thanks much.
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That last 4 lines pulled my heart strings. So many ifs, we may never know.
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Thank you, Grace.
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Final stanza (esp last 2 lines): Bella!
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Thank you, Ron, glad you enjoyed.
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Brilliant, Lisa … with a perfect ending!
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Thank you, Helen.
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Very well done, Lisa. Love the music as well!
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Thank you, Dwight. I love how they sang it also.
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You are welcome!
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I really don’t know how you put these poems together based on what to me sound like pretty complicated instructions. What I do know is I like the performance of the choir. Did you know that Eric Clapton covered the tune as well in a reggae-flavored version?
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Christian this one was easy: take the last lines from your last 12 or more poems and try to put them in an order that makes “sense” and I use the term loosely. Yes, I know EC’s cover it and the female singer puts a great emphasis/spin on it. That’s probably the raggae version?
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I guess I should have listened to EC’s cover before making my clever comment. It’s definitely not reggae. That said, to me, it does have an island/ Caribbean feel to it, though that’s my subjective perception! 🙂
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The version I’m thinking of is from his album, “There’s One in Every Crowd.” Looking at wiki, the two female backup singers are Yvonne Elliman (of Mary Mag in JChristSuperstar fame) and Marcy Levy. Not sure which one does the breakout vocals. I used to have this album many moons ago am pretty familiar with it. Wiki says it was album he made right after 461 Ocean Blvd. Yes, it has a Caribbean feel to it and starts out sounding kinda raggae.
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Both sad and beautiful are these last lines that haunt, well done! 👏👏
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Tricia, thanks much.
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💓
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The questions that never get answered… haunting, yes
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Thank you, Margaret.
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They work very well together.
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Thanks, Sadje. Lots of good found poems coming out of this prompt.
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I’ll try it too.
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Lovely and so very poignant, Lisa.
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Thanks, Merril.
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You’re welcome, Lisa.
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Hauntingly beautiful, Li! Your lines came together beautifully. ❤️
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Thank you, Punam ❤
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My pleasure. ❤️
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A lovely poem, Lisa, though bittersweet at the end. The last line is so fitting.
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Thank you, Sunra. I was going to have the last line be what I turned into the title.
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I would say that was definitely a good decision, as I prefer the last line you chose 🙂
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That third stanza especially resonates. (K)
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Thank you, K.
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A heartrending piece yet so gently rendered. I love the way the dialogue found its way in so perfectly.
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Mish, thank you.
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An intriguing prompt. Okay, perhaps I’m hooked…Going gathering.
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Cool!
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Beautiful especially the last line ❤
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Thank you, AJ!
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Beautifully arranged, Lisa. These last lines harmonize into such a poignant mixture of grief and hope for the future.
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Dora, thank you very much.
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Indeed, we may never know, but the question is a good one, what took you so long is both playful and a grief, beautiful poem.
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Paul, many thanks ❤
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My pleasure Lisa
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Cute, cute, cute, cute , CUTE! 😍
I just love that cute little lamb! 🥰
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Glad you like it, thanks, Gia!
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That got a little grim at the end…I like the change in it.
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Thank you, Max. It surreally made sense.
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