It’s 4:15, time to leave,

to pick up kids who need rides,

to services, just like every Tuesday.

 

Starting to shut things down,

getting my desk in order;

my boss appears at

the entrance to my cubicle.

 

“It’s time for your annual review.”

 

Oh really, you never even gave me one last year!

 

“It’ll just take a few minutes.”

 

This means I’m not going to pick the kids up on time.

 

“Well, Lisa, usually we just tell you how you did,

But I’m giving you a copy to read along with.”

 

Yah, I’ve been here 24 years, you a little over a year,

And it happens every which way, depending on boss.

 

“Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah…

Your attitude is downright aggressive with your

co-workers at times, and remember that email

you sent telling me not to assign you more cases?

I could have taken that to the big bosses, but I

didn’t.”

 

There’s so much I would like to respond back to you

you lame [bleep!], but I’ve only got 7 months to go

until retirement, so I will bite my tongue and say

nothing.

 

“Next section.  You are one of the most dedicated

workers we have here.  You always go above

and beyond.  Your work habits are flawless.”

 

Do you know how schizoid it sounds, to

say my attitude is horrible but my work habits

are peerless?

 

“Well, Lisa, I’m very impressed with how you

are handling your evaluation.  Maybe, o.k. yes,

I’ll change this 3 I gave you to a 4.  Oh my,

the big bosses will be asking me to explain

these high scores, but you have earned them.”

 

This piece of work looks at me as Pavlov’s dog

and he’s ringing a bell.  Am I supposed to

sit up and look pretty?

 

“You know, Lisa, I may not ride this place out

for the 10 years I need to be vested.

If I leave, maybe you and I could get some

of those old contracts I had back.

I paid my old therapists six figures.

We could do it, Lisa, you and me.”

 

I feel a gorge rising in my throat.

 

I smile and say, “Yes, boss.  That would be great.”