My ex-husband put himself through nursing school by working as an orderly at a hospital. He worked the psych unit and the ER as an orderly and did over 30 years as an ER nurse. He saw a lot of psych patients over that time.
His expertise helped me once, when I had a bad “trip” after smoking what I thought was a harmless joint of weed. We were watching the Star Trek movie, “The Search for Spock” and the scene came on where Spock’s coffin was in the jungle/tall grass? I lost touch with reality at that point and started freaking out. He calmly led me to the bathroom and had me start brushing my teeth, which worked miraculously in bringing me back. He said that a person having mental distress should turn to one of their ordinary Acts of Daily Living (ADLs) which is very grounding.
It’s been awhile since thinking about that. It was spurred when I started washing the dishes and saw 2 of my favorite 3 coffee mugs in the dishwater. It struck me that years ago, I would have had one and only one favorite mug, and that if anything would have happened to the mug it would have caused some level of distress or discomfort. These days I have 3 favorite mugs. If one gets dropped, lost, chipped, or otherwise put out of commission, it’s no big deal.
I started thinking about my ex and one of the mantras they used to use with the psych patients in the psych unit he worked in: “Every day, in every way, I’m getting better and better.” Based on the coffee cup situation, I say I’m getting better.
Tao Talk 
This was interesting – why do I have two of every one of these things: a cup for black tea (two, both Haig’s tall and green, gifts at Christmas), a cup for white tea (shorter, thicker to keep it hot longer because I only drink white tea when writing and get easily distracted – so often nuked), a cup for white coffee (similar to tea, but taller and thinner around the lip – nuked coffee tastes like mud), a cup for coffee black (I like the half-tall, thin cup but tall so the aroma wafts into the nose before the fluid onto the tongue).
Yes, two cups, exactly the same, for each type of drink.
Am I an obsessive? Of course. But I’ve trained my other half to do it my way, so it doesn’t matter!
And if one gets broken – I get to give one to other half, and go out and buy a new pair!
I do like the Acts of Ordinary Life – I could use that in a story …
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Now wait a minute. Are you saying your “other half” knows which cup you need each of these things and prepares them for you the way you like? That, my friend, is LOVE. You are blessed. I would love to see you weave the Acts into a story!
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Ex-mil – knows how to follow orders [slaps hand to mouth – do not say that aloud!].
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The pragmatist says, “whatever works”.
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And (on a more honest and courteous note) the other half partner is an absolutely wonderful person – much better at being the good guy than I am. I do wish for someone who could cook better than me … but I have love, respect, occasional admiration, and someone the dog likes. it’s important, all of it, but most of all is the ability to leave me alone when I need it. Life is good, most of the time, and said partner likes to remind me of those times …
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❤ someone the dog likes is important. the rest follows, and it sounds like it follows for you and the partner. with that in place the rest becomes easier…
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Such a nice story and I’m going to remember the brusing if I feel panic coming on, thanks have a wonderful holiday
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You are welcome ❤
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Great advice !
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thank you 🙂
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