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OctPoWriMo2019 Day 24 — breathe — Take You In Push It Out (song)

Image result for cruising down highway

Take You In Push It Out

Verse:
Had a day like I never had before
Want to run, want to run right out the door
Oh this job, oh it gives me such a pain
When I come have to come back here again
Only thing, thing that makes it worth my while
Is at night when I see your pretty smile

Chorus:
Take you in like fresh sunshine in the air
Push it out and forget it’s even there
Take you in cuz you make me feel alive
Push it out, babe let’s go out for a ride

Verse:
Boss man said gotta work, work late again
Then he laughed and walked out with all his friends
Missed the game it was playoff night tonight
That’s the third one I missed and that aint right
If I could I’d walk out right here and now
But your love makes me keep on here somehow

Chorus:
Take you in like fresh sunshine in the air
Push it out and forget it’s even there
Take you in cuz you make me feel alive
Push it out, babe let’s go out for a ride

Bridge:
I knew I’d be workin til the day that I died
Under two-bit bosses, bosses crushing my pride
Or until my body broke down or my mind zombified
Or until the hand of fate, fate that could turn the tide.

Verse:
On the day that you won the lottery
And you came to my worksite to see me
And you saw how the bossman yanked my chain
And your eyes lit up with some righteous flame
And you yelled, Bossman take your job and shoveit
And I yelled to my buds, Hey don’t you love it!

Chorus:
Take you in like fresh sunshine in the air
Push it out and forget it’s even there
Take you in cuz you make me feel alive
Push it out, babe let’s go out for a ride

Now the time’s here to head out on the road
With my angel who lightens every load

 

I’m thinking of this song with a country beat, with the verses and chorus like “Rub It In”
and the bridge like the one in “Love Potion #9”.  I would love to work with someone to develop this song but I don’t have the first clue about how to go about it.  If anybody knows songwriters or musicians who might want to take a look at it, please let me know.

Morgan Dragonwillow (and today’s co-host, Michele Vecchito) is the host of OctPoWriMo.  Michele says:
How do you deal with stress? Do you practice mindful breathing or meditation? Can you let go and see what happens?
Suggested form: Song
Word prompts:
surrender
empower
rest
song/music
breath/breathe
trust
wonder

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Exploring poetry in all its forms.

23 thoughts on “OctPoWriMo2019 Day 24 — breathe — Take You In Push It Out (song)

  1. The words are really good but that is no surprise from you… You are ahead of the game already. I’ve been given things before where one line is 7 syllables and the next 14 and so on. This one is averaging 9-10 syllables a line and that is half the battle. Every line doesn’t have to match…but not too drastic of a difference.

    Some writers may look at what I wrote and say ohhh… yes you can…and in some instances you can…it depends on the phrasing but it does make it easier like you have it.

    I go on Syllables a lot.

    It’s really good Lisa

    Liked by 3 people

      1. You don’t have to match completelyl…just if you have a line with 4 and one with 10 ….repeat that sequence 4…10…4…10 etc.
        Yes I don’t know why I capitalized it lol…
        I had a country guy that wanted me to put muic to his stuff…well everything ended up sounding like power pop.

        I learned something about country. The chorus and verse voice inflections go down in country and with me I want to go I want to go up because that is rock/pop.

        My friends told me I could make a song about the rodeo sound Beatle-ish lol

        Liked by 2 people

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