Reflections by: Yunus Emre Uzun
After the rock rolled away from the cave entrance and Jesus emerged, everyone saw him ascend to the heavens. His believers have faith that one day he will descend from heaven and take the faithful back to heaven with him.
What no humans saw was later that night Jesus came back down over the Pacific Ocean – and continued down beneath the surface. Jesus loved the earth too much to leave it. He decided to make a new home for himself in a lovely cave on the ocean floor five miles down.
It was important that no people saw Jesus was still here on earth as their religion depended on him being in heaven and choosing only his followers to save when humans had finished their chaos and mayhem on earth. A few times deep-sea diving submarines’ and research pods’ headlights flickered in the darkness. Being the son of God has its perks and Jesus would shape the pilots’ minds to go another way, away from his cave home.
Although he did not need to breathe oxygen or eat food, Jesus craved being on the surface and doing both from time to time. It was then he would slowly rise rise rise, appreciating the life forms he passed along the way. His favorites were sea turtles and parrot fish.
That first breath after hitting air always felt the best. Finding an out of the way restaurant and sneaking into the kitchen and nabbing tasty tidbits always gave Jesus a thrill. Pulling his hoody over to shroud his face, Jesus would walk about and hope not to get harassed by either gang members or police officers; he enjoyed being amongst humans again. They were fine in small doses, if only they could learn to appreciate their Mother Earth.
After his airside excursion, Jesus would walk back to the water, blending into the night. On the way back to his underwater abode, he took “the express,” where he simply dissolved into particles and reconstituted in seconds back in his cave.
Please note: this story about a famous religious figure is in no way meant to be disrespectful or blasphemous. It’s a fun fictional story that I think Jesus would enjoy.
Sadje is the host of What Do You See?