TSM 201 — Return Forever


Existentials traversed to nethers’ wilds. Necessary lies, now I
Return
wise, a willing sacrifice
to the
excised, still rhythmed heart’s
scene of
invisible keening-rent-divine of
the crime —
your forever silent judgment:
guilty.

Today’s poem is in Waltmarie form, described as: 10 line poem, any subject, even numbered lines are 2 syllables and form their own poem when read separately. Odd lines are longer with no specific syllable count.

The title of the poem is very similar (missing a “to”) to a Chick Corea album, so in honor of that most excellent album I am including a cut from it.

top image:  Photo by Jonah Reenders

Carrie is the host of The Sunday Muse.  Carrie says:
~Look
~Write
~Link
~Visit others as you would have them visit you
& have fun everyone!

33 Comments Add yours

  1. Carrie V. H.'s avatar Carrie V. H. says:

    The Waltmarie form is one I have never seen. This is done well Lisa. You always know so many wonderful and different poetic forms. I hope you have a great weekend my friend

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Carrie, glad you enjoyed the poem. I have noticed when my emotions want to have their way with me I use forms more. Thank you very much, hoping yours is great also <3

      Like

  2. The Hinoeuma's avatar The Hinoeuma says:

    Are those your feetz?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      No, Vic. This is the image that we have been given this week to inspire us to write an ekphrastic poem. That said, my feet don’t look so different from these (except mine are clean lol.)

      Like

      1. The Hinoeuma's avatar The Hinoeuma says:

        LOL! Clean feetz is GOOD! :D

        Liked by 2 people

        1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

          :) I value my feet and try to take good care of them.

          Like

          1. The Hinoeuma's avatar The Hinoeuma says:

            Me, too!!!🦶🦶

            Liked by 1 person

  3. memadtwo's avatar memadtwo says:

    Silent judgement–the worst kind. (K)

    Liked by 1 person

  4. hdwoonie23's avatar Helen Dehner says:

    You “do” this form so well … I love the whole and I love the two!!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Helen, thank you <3

      Like

  5. Sadje's avatar Sadje says:

    Great take Li. There is such poignancy in your poem.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Sadje, thank you <3

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Sadje's avatar Sadje says:

        You’re welcome

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Wow, Lisa… What a flow. I could imagine somebody (not me) rapping this!

    -David

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Thanks, David. You never know when it could happen…

      Like

  7. qbit's avatar qbit says:

    Very cool form there, and the poem seems to walk with a limp, banging down on those wonderful one-word accents.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Wonderful feedback, thank you, Q.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. wyndolynne's avatar wyndolynne says:

    This form creates the pauses that create a reluctance around the central poem; the idea of guilt is both complicated and reinforced.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Wyndolynne, thank you for your insights here.

      Like

  9. Truedessa's avatar Truedessa says:

    Interesting form that works well with your message.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Thank you, Truedessa.

      Like

  10. Sherry Marr's avatar Sherry Marr says:

    I am unfamiliar with this form too, but you have executed it very well.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Thank you, Sherry!

      Like

  11. Dale's avatar Dale says:

    ooh… I like this form! Gonna have to add it to my list!
    Well done, Madam!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Dale's avatar Dale says:

      Oh! And I forgot to mention I love Return to Forever… ;-)

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

        Yes! It’s marvelous isn’t it.

        Liked by 1 person

    2. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Goody, Dale! Try to let me know when you use it. Thanks for reading and your comment.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Dale's avatar Dale says:

        Lordy. I have a draft that lists all the ones I want to try (with examples – yours has just been entered).

        Liked by 1 person

  12. Syl's avatar Syl says:

    Didn’t know this form,
    But it’s powerful, especially because of that last word: guilty.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Syl, thank you.

      Like

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