You cannot pluck moonlight to bring in your pocket!
Helen Hoyt – October Letter
“C’mon, be adventurous for a change,” said Tommy, his voice an edged plaintive whine.
Again, I was inadequate in Tommy’s estimation. Like when Tommy handed me a pink pill and said it would be a thrill. Or when he begged me to do a threesome. I refused each time, but his subtle, repeat recriminations were eroding my self esteem. I loved Tommy, but was the price he asked worth it?
“OK, I’ll go with you into the cavern, but I need light and am going back to get my flashlight.”
“Midnight’s two minutes away, and you cannot pluck moonlight to bring in your pocket!”
Tommy grabbed my hand, pulling me into sheer black, water sounds trickling around us.
My phone screen glowed red as Tommy led the way; his laughter, echoing on stone, ended with a strangled gurgle as the knife answered my question.
[144 words]
Mish is today’s host of dVerse’ Prosery. Mish says:
Write a piece of flash fiction or other prose of up to or exactly 144 words, including the given line.
Tao Talk 
Suspenseful and alluring like Tommy himself! I didn’t see that ending coming but I definitely saw the red flags with the characterization of Tommy. Nice one, Lisa.
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Thanks, Mish. I debated on whether to have an unknown beastie get Tommy or the ending I chose, but it came down to word count.
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Anonymous is Mish. Forgot to log in.
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cheeky Tommy lol. but well done crafting this story. 👏👏💕
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I don’t think cheeky Tommy deserved what he got, but it worked for the story :) Thank you, Byngnigel.
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lol… welcome.
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Always listen to your intuition. (K)
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100% yes.
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Karma comes for us all. Including Tommy, this time. An eerie, and excellent, write, Lisa!
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Well said, Frank! There is something about October that has me diving deeply into the shadows. Thank you so much.
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I want to scream, “Go! Before it’s too late! Trust your instincts!”
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Christine, I know what you mean. That very fate may have been awaiting her if she hadn’t struck first.
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good story!
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Thank you :)
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Scary story Lisa!
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Thanks for reading, Carol Anne. Don’t say you weren’t warned ;)
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I wasn’t expecting that. Super spooky. A real final twist. Bravo!
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K, thank you very much and delighted you enjoyed the story :)
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😀
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OMG this is dark!!!
Happy Monday
Much💛love
P.s. i read your comment saying you cannot always comment at my blog. I have had those kinds of problems myself trying to comment at sime blogs; depending on the browser being used and too the device being used
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Thanks for being a faithful reader, Gillena. I’ve tried various ways to comment at your blog, and before I could usually do it through blogger or by signing in through google, but nothing seems to work anymore. I use firefox as a browser so maybe that’s the problem?
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Oh my… a bloody good story! Scary stuff!
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Thank you, Dwight! The combo of it being October and my reading Chuck Palahniuk’s new dark satire has put me in a wicked state of mind :)
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Great thriller story, well told!
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Jay, thank you very much. Glad you enjoyed it :)
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this prompt seems to be bringing out some dark! very well written.
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Thank you, Ren. Any time someone tries to steal light from the moon, there’s going to be shadows rippling from it :)
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Well your warning made me want to read it more… it’s like banning a song.
I like it! Tommy won’t be bugging you anymore.
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Max, I love your comment, no he won’t! Thank you.
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Ooh, a dark ending for Tommy. Well written my friend
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Sadje, thank you! It’s the last line he will ever cross…
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You’re welcome Li
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Tommy took one step too far. I think I should have put a warning on mine… yours at least gives a reason.
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Yes, he did, and she knew it would never end as long as she was with him. Me personally I would just leave him there in the cave and in life. With your story, Bjorn, your reason is tacitly understood.
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I smiled at the warning of disturbing content, Lisa, and knew that this was my kind of story! Just the right kind of story for an October evening – only I’m reading it in the morning. You made Tommy an unlikeable character from the start and I was glad he got his comeuppance.
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Thank you so much, Kim, and am happy you enjoyed the story.
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My pleasure, Lisa.
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I was wondering about the question the knife answered. Was it ‘Where would you like this?’
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LOL!
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I enjoyed this read, especially the subliminal red glow on the phone screen, saying it couldn’t continue – great story…
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Very happy you caught that about the screen glow. Thank you!
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You are welcome 🤗
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