relationships

Tale Weaver #227 – Wedding – 13th June

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Michael is the host of Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie’s Tale Weaver. Micheal says:

So this week consider the notion of a wedding to be the topic for you to write about.

Wedding is a word that is so full of myriad emotions that range from extreme joy to extreme dread. For me, the word wedding is synonymous with contract, so it is difficult for me to get too overjoyed when I think of them that way. When I believed the cultural brainwashing it was more like a fairy tale feeling for them, where the cultural belief is each finds “the one” and becomes one in holy union. As time went on and I participated in a marriage and observed friends, family members, acquaintances, co-workers, and multi-media images of weddings and marriages, cognitive dissonance pulled me out of the fairy tale. A wedding is a moment in time for two individuals that may be a fairy tale leading up to it and perhaps continues for the short period of a honeymoon afterwards, but after that real life commences, sometimes including fighting, drug addiction, cheating, domestic violence, and too often, eventual divorce. So much for “until death do we part.”

I don’t want to make this post a downer for the romanticists reading. Instead I’m going to turn it lighthearted and talk about one of my favorite movies about weddings, “The Wedding Crashers.” If you haven’t seen this movie, it stars Owen Wilson and Vince Vaughn as friends who work as domestic (marriage/divorce) mediators. Their hobby is crashing complete strangers’ weddings. They have a list of rules for how to get the most out of each wedding crash experience and of course how not to get caught. There would be no story without introducing conflict into it. Owen and Vince (or the characters they play) meet up with a couple of guests at a wedding that turn things topsy turvy. I don’t want to give away any spoilers and so will stop there with the plot, other than to say it’s a hilarious movie with an all-star cast.

13 thoughts on “Tale Weaver #227 – Wedding – 13th June

  1. I’ve only caught the end of it. The trailer looks like it would be worth seeing the whole thing. (That one gal is scary though.)

    Speaking of contracts, I recommend taking that for real. A pre-nup is more common in Judaism (because looking forward to neglecting an ex wife isn’t a value of the community, especially if there are children). Additionally, I have a cousin (raised Catholic) who married a guy [neither Jewish] who quit his job after they married and started gambling her money. When she divorced him, she had to pay him support simply because she made more money. They had no child(ren). You’re at the mercy of whatever state you live in without a prenuptial agreement. And some states don’t let you out until both people agree to the terms, while other states have a formula. She was glad to get out.

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  2. Yes, Marleen, you should see the whole thing. It’s too bad you already saw the end. Good information to know on pre-nups. Question: how iron-clad are pre-nuptials? Knowing how so many types of contracts can be wheedled around, I’d be afraid a loophole or escape clause could be found.

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  3. I haven’t seen that one. Weddings are a contract – Yes, I can agree with that.
    And yet looking beyond my own success (and a few others, more than a few) I also see all the broken contracts. Rarely have I seen divorce that ends friendly though it does occur. Having a father who married three times… (The first one ended in death, one in divorce and finally his own death).

    My own wedding wasn’t really for me. It was for my parents. And talk about stress… I have one wedding photo of me where I think a vein is going to burst out of my forehead! So many traditions. If I could do it over again I think I’d elope! 😉

    But the joke is …What is it that a bride can’t do after the father has paid for the wedding?….Cantaloupe! 🙂

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  4. Jules, I love your response. My mom married twice, once with my dad and it lasted 10 years. It was close to 40 with her and my stepdad. My dad never remarried. One marriage was enough — strike that, more than enough — for me, but two wonderful sons came out of it so I’m not sorry it happened.

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  5. I’ve got a half sibling… that used to talk to me…but I haven’t heard from in years. I’m tired of being the one to gently push for a relationship. Distance makes it harder. Some relatives seem to enjoy their own surroundings – it is what it is.

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