A red moon rides on the humps of the low river hills.
— Carl Sandburg, from Jazz Fantasia
A red moon rides on the humps of the low river hills. My head tilts just so and I swear the hills are moving like a great dark beast; a shadowy twin of my guilt, following. Red rippling water radiates from the far side of the river; accusation calling from the cabin. I hurry along and away from my sin, stumbling on the narrow path through the dunegrass. He’ll be home soon and the table isn’t set.
The moon hides behind clouds as his work boots clump along the wooden porch to the door and he enters.
“Good evening, Father.”
He sits quietly at the kitchen table, head bowed, waiting for me to serve him crockpot stew, biscuits, and a glass of port.
After dinner, as I clear the table, he smells the scent of blood and looks up, head swiveling toward me.
[144 words]
Lillian is today’s host at dVerse. Lillian says:
The prompt is to include either the line “a red moon rides on the humps of the low river hills” OR the line “moan like an autumn wind high in the lonesome treetops” in a piece of prose (not poetry) that is 144 words or less. The two lines are from Carl Sandburg’s poem JAZZ FANTASIA – you’ll find his full poem here.
Oh…..I wish you were here with me….I just let out an audible “ohhhhhh” when I finished reading this! What a twist! A macabre tale indeed! Oh that blood red moon precipitates dastardly deeds indeed!
Glad you posted today! 🙂
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So glad you enjoyed the story, Lillian, thank you.
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I love the focus on the red moon and the hills in the first paragraph, Lisa, to set the scene, which you have done so well, especially ‘I swear the hills are moving like a great dark beast’ and the red rippling water. I also like the suggested urgency to get home in ‘He’ll be home soon and the table isn’t set’, and the ominous clump of the work boots. The final line is chilling.
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Kim thank you!
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Ooooh! Bone chilling! I love how you built up the tension and then wham ..the last line!!
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Thank you, Punam!
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You are welcome.
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A very clever and strong slice of prose here; like it a lot. This could be the descriptive prose on the rear cover of a novel, full of hooks and teasers. I see it as a werewolf family, and this was her first kill.
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Glenn, thank you! I wanted to leave it to the imagination of the reader as to what she’s done. Very very possible!
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Intriguing story Li. Exceptionally well written
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A chilling tale starts up a mysterious moon setting end wit what next as i read
Happy Monday
much love…
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Gillena thank you very much for reading and your comment ❤
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Oh my goodness, the last two paragraphs are incredible.
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Thanks much, glad you enjoyed the tale.
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Oh my, a chilling tale .,., and we’re left to write the ending as we see fit. I don’t know how to make it a happy one ! Well done.
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Uh oh! This is full of mystery (and gore). 😀
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🙂 Thanks for reading, Merril!
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You’re very welcome!
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Fabulous! So powerful! ❤
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Thank you, Carol anne!
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Scary!
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Thank you for reading, Imelda.
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Leaving us guessing again…although we can safely conclude we probably don’t want to know the source of the blood. (K)
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My lips are sealed.
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THAT ending.
Bravo, bravo! This is what we call a true, unexpected twist. I was honestly not anticipating it. You utilized the prompt brilliantly to create this enthralling tale and prose. The imagery is immersive around the red moon and I love how descriptive this piece is. Amazing, amazing writing.
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Lucy, happy to hear you liked the story 🙂 Thank you!
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Love that line ” a shadowy twin of my guilt.” This could keep going as a story, but it’s also wonderfully evocative as a short.
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Thank you, Jedediah.
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Brrrrrr … I don’t have a very good feeling about the place this is heading … Well done, you!
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Thank you much, Na’ama.
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Ooooh, I’m all shivery now! So good ❤
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🙂 Thanks, Lael!
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You left me holding my breath on this one… Well done Lisa.
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Thank you, Dwight.
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Always keep ’em guessing…and you do that well!
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It gets the gears turning doesn’t it 🙂
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Yes it does! Never give too much away.
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I just finished the movies movies movies for tomorrow. Some good selections this week, including one major mindbender.
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I love a mindbender…I’m looking forward to it.
I just watched “Manhunter” 1986…the first Hannibal Lector movie. Really good. It was before Silence of the Lambs…I had no clue.
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Is that the movie where the FBI’s profiling unit with John Douglas gets started? Actually I think that one is called Mindhunter. So there is a prequel to Silence of the Lambs? Worth seeing? I remember reading that book (Silence of…) before seeing the movie. It scared the living bejeezus out of me!
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Yes it is…It was filmed in the 80s and there is no mistaking that but I liked it. Brian Cox as Lector is great. Tom Noonan as Francis Dollarhyde does a wonderful job…or totally creepy job.
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Is Francis Dollarhyde Buffalo Bill?
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No…the Tooth Fairy…a very creepy guy
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Ugh sounds sinister. I hate dentists already, and this sounds like one that has gone round the bend.
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No he is not a dentist…I don’t think no…lol I forgot why they called him that.
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Lisa… the reason I knew about it was because of CB…he has some interesting takes on movies.
https://cincinnatibabyhead.wordpress.com/2019/09/29/movie-manhunter/
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Just read it. I am following him now 🙂
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He is a cool guy…very down to earth.
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So many blogs, too little time 😦 I wish I had clones of myself! What was that Michael Keaton movie where he made clones of himself? I remember it didn’t work out very well for him 🙂
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Oh yea Multiplicity…it’s been a long time. Yea I need that as well. Sometimes it’s overwhelming.
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nail biting mystery! great story telling
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Thank you 🙂
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Oh! Wow, Lisa. This was fantabulous!
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Dale, so glad you enjoyed the story. Thank you 🙂
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Very much so. 🙂
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Marvelous and dark- and what a cliffhanger!
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🙂 Thank you so much, Linda.
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So much tension in so few words and then the ending. I’m making up the ending in my head.
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So cool, Debi. What do you think it’s all about?
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I like the werewolf theory but I lean toward murder of a lover or she met with the “healer” to rid herself of a baby.
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Good possibilities, Debi!
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Breathtaking! There are so many ways in which this “sin” can go! I actually wondered if the protagonist was washing away a menstral cycle, or evidence of a sexual encounter, when I read the last line. A true tour de force!
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Let me clarify: that the protagonist might consider her menstral cycle, or a sexual encounter, as a “sin” from the perspective of her father. In this sense, I can see your story as a critque of patriarchy.
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I can see that also, Frank. She does appear afraid of and/or controlled by her father. Maybe he’s not even her bio dad but a priest?
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Frank, thank you very much. Good possibilities!
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