dVerse — Poetics — Our Stories

Woman at the Well iii by Hyatt Moore - Painter

(There are) many stories which are not on paper,
they are written in the bodies and minds of women.
Amrita Pritam

I hear her each morning
before she rounds the corner
heading to the well.

It is a shuffling, almost furtive,
where her worn sandals
scuffle hard-packed dust.

It would have been kinder to kill her,
but he is not a kind man.
Something about her scuffle
excites him. Reminds him of
the strength it took to take her —
to break her.

Yet there is something else
there in her sound that
rounds the corner each morning.

It is determination.
It is refusal.
It is victory.

Punam is today’s guest host for dVerse’ Poetics. Punam says:
For today’s poetics I am sharing five lines from various poems of Amrita Pritam. Use anyone of them as an epigraph, or as a springboard for your verse. Write in a form of your choice. Do mention Amrita Pritam as the source of your inspiration.

  1. When a man denies the power of women, he is denying his subconscious.
  2. Like an offering at the altar of the spirit, our names slipping out of our lips, became a sacred hymn.
  3. (There are) many stories which are not on paper, they are written in the bodies and minds of women.
  4. Perhaps I will become a ray of sunshine, to be embraced by your colours. I will paint myself on your canvas.
  5. Look further on ahead, there between truth and falsehood, a little empty space.

top image:  “Woman at the Well iii” by Hyatt Moore

Oops!  Apologies for forgetting to put the title on it.  I blamed WP but it was my boo boo.

35 Comments Add yours

  1. Li, you portrayed that vicious excitement in him so well! But what I love most is those last lines! Bravo! ❤️

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Thank you, Punam. I don’t like to go into that headspace very often to think about things I’ve experienced, learned about, etc., but Poetess Amrita Pritam walked with me there and gave me strength <3

      Liked by 2 people

      1. My thought, exactly. I would not want to be inside that mind.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. It is not a nice place to visit, I agree but I am glad you wrote this. You are so welcome. ❤️

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Sadje's avatar Sadje says:

    Love how you’ve ended this poem.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Sadje, thank you very much. Just an fyi: on your comment it says you are commenting on “23603” instead of the title of the poem. Looks like WP is being glitchy today :(

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Sadje's avatar Sadje says:

        That’s weird! You’re welcome my friend

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

          Sadje, I realized I forgot to put a title on it, so it is my bad. Sorry WP! :)

          Liked by 1 person

          1. Sadje's avatar Sadje says:

            Haha! I do it too. No worries

            Liked by 1 person

  3. hdwoonie23's avatar Helen says:

    Lisa your words have resonated deeply, deeply.

    Like

  4. Sunra Rainz's avatar Sunra Rainz says:

    Indeed, Lisa :-) So well-put. Sometimes, victory is quiet determination just like that.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Sunra, thank you <3

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Sunra Rainz's avatar Sunra Rainz says:

        You’re most welcome, Lisa 💖

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Grace's avatar Grace says:

          That is an excellent character sketch of both the man and woman. The ending part is open to interpretation and can be good or bad. Love your response !

          Liked by 2 people

          1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

            Grace thank you so much for your thoughtful comment <3

            Like

  5. Rob Kistner's avatar Rob Kistner says:

    Your poem packs a powerful punch of real truth Lisa. Yes!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Thanks much, Rob.

      Like

  6. memadtwo's avatar memadtwo says:

    That inner strength is usually invisible to the person who inflicts the pain. But it is patient. One can only hope it finds the opening it needs to escape. (K)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Good way of putting it, Kerfe.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Glenn A. Buttkus's avatar Glenn A. Buttkus says:

    So much unsaid and implied here; really hooked my interest though, pulling for the protagonist.I love your comments on my blog.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Thank you very much, Glenn.

      Like

  8. calmkate's avatar calmkate says:

    potent writing Lisa, you captured both sides so well!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Kate, thank you very much.

      Liked by 1 person

  9. Great poem, Lisa. This man definitely doesn’t deserve the lady. I hope she finds the strength to dump him!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Thanks much for reading and your comment. I hope she is rid of him sooner rather than later.

      Liked by 1 person

  10. Reena Saxena's avatar Reena Saxena says:

    Reblogged this on Reena Saxena and commented:
    It is determination.
    It is refusal.
    It is victory.

    By Lisa

    Liked by 1 person

  11. kittysverses's avatar kittysverses says:

    Wonderful poem, Li. :)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Kitty, thank you <3

      Like

  12. Vartika's avatar Vartika says:

    Wow.. I am a big fan of Amrita pritam. Your poem is mesmerising

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Vartika, thank you. Punam challenged us at dVerse to write a poem that was inspired by Amrita Pritam.

      Liked by 1 person

  13. Badfinger (Max)'s avatar Badfinger (Max) says:

    Great sad poem… I love that painting also….the style

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lisa or Li's avatar msjadeli says:

      Max, thanks much.

      Liked by 1 person

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