ORIGINAL POEM (SONG)
I’m Not Sayin’, by Gordon Lightfoot
I’m not sayin’ that I love you
I’m not sayin’ that I’ll care if you love me
I’m not sayin’ that I’ll care
I’m not sayin’ I’ll be there when you need me
I can’t give my heart to you
Or tell you that I’ll sing your name up to the sky
I can’t lay the promise down
That I’ll always be around when you need me
Now I may not be alone each time you see me
Along the street or in a small cafe
But still I won’t deny you or mistreat you
Baby if you let me have my way
I’m not sayin’ I’ll be sorry
For all the things that I might say that make you cry
I can’t say I’ll always do
The things you want me to
I’m not sayin’ I’ll be true but I’ll try
Now I may not be alone each time you see me
Or show up when I promised that I would
But still I won’t deny you or mistreat you
Baby if you love me like you should
I’m not sayin’ I’ll be sorry
For all the things that I might say that make you cry
I can’t say I’ll always do
The things you want me to
I’m not sayin’ I’ll be true but I’ll try
I can’t say I’ll always do
The things you want me to
I’m not sayin’ I’ll be true but I’ll try
Songwriter: Gordon Lightfoot
My palinode:
I Promise
You wept, askance
at my arrogance.
Not one to be alone
in love, you flew.
It’s been a year —
I can’t think
of anyone
but you.
Please, dear heart,
my ego is now trained
from it you’ll hear not a peep
if your green eyes notice me again.
No future promises will be needed, as
I’m already there.
I care!
I’ll be there!
My heart is now yours forever.
My voice rise in lamentation at your absence!
I’m yours alone.
Yours to command.
I’ll never make you cry again.
Yours to command.
I’m yours alone.
Baby, please come home.
Top image: “The Abandonment,” by Andre Kohn
Grace is today’s host for dVerse’ Meet the Bar. Grace says:
the writing challenge is to write a palinode. This can be in relation to a poem you have written before (please link or include prior poem), or as part of poem e.g. Palinode by Monica Youn.
A change in emotions between the first poem and the second one. I guess the second one is more heart felt, forgiving and pleading with the other one. Time does make one a sentimental person (or fool).
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Grace.
LikeLike
This is incredibly evocative! I especially love; “My voice rise in lamentation at your absence! I’m yours alone.” You capture the intensity of Lightfoot’s poem so well! 💝💝
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you, Sanaa 🙂
LikeLike
I didn’t know the Gordon Lightfoot song, Lisa, so I read it as a poem that uses repetition to make reverse statements, which you turned around so skillfully. I love the lyricality and the rhyming of ‘askance’ with arrogance’.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Kim, I’m glad to introduce you to this Gord song. Thank you for the feedback and glad you enjoyed it 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
I enjoyed your response to Gordon Lightfoot. I hope it was him who changed his mind and decided he loved the lady all along – it sounds as if he’s headed that way by the end of the song 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes, it is him who changed his mind, at least in the song. He does sing another one with that sentiment, called, “Your Love’s Return,” that I adore. He knows he’s been a fool and wants the love of his life to come back.
LikeLiked by 1 person
That’s sweet! I do love his songs, especially ‘If you could read my mind’ 😭
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
I love how you made this as a response to another poet (which was my first thought)… love how the end of Gordon Lightfoot’s poem and yours make me believe that there can be reconciliation.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you very much, Bjorn.
LikeLike
You are the first to use another poet to write to; kudos. Your response, your palinode is very effective and precise. Nice work.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Glenn, thank you. I need to get to the trail to see what everyone else wrote. I’m stubborn so didn’t want to backtrack on any position lol
LikeLike
so nice! Loved it! ❤
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you, Carol anne, very glad you liked it.
LikeLike
Interesting take responding to another versus your own work. I feel like Gordon Lightfoot offers some good opportunities for a response.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, TJS, and yes, he does.
LikeLiked by 1 person
good one Lisa … I’m a big fan of GL and you rebutted him so cleverly playing on his own words to reverse his sentiment! great skill
LikeLiked by 1 person
Kate, thank you! I love that song, but his arrogance just peeved me. Time to let him feel a little sting, at least in my poem lol. I truly adore Gordon Lightfoot, his songs have been keeping me company for years.
LikeLiked by 1 person
yes my Canuk friends introduced me decades ago … I love his nature songs best
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ah GL. Reminds me of driving in the countryside, friends in the backseat, dreaming of the future while we burned through the present. Your response is just as haunting. Splendid work.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Masa, thank you for your poetic comment and your kind words.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Excellent response to Lightfoot’s song lyrics. If you love ’em, say so!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes! But you know how that ego is, and guys are taught don’t show feelings, play it cool. I’m glad he wised up, at least in the poem 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
Fantastic poem Li.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Sadje, thank you very much.
LikeLiked by 1 person
You’re welcome 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
This song does just call for a palinode, and I enjoyed every bit of yours. The rhythm and the voice are perfect! 💯
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much, Tricia. I was determined to find a song that started out “negative” and turn it around rather than vice versa.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes, it works well!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Excellent Lisa, I liked your stand herein, felt honest and strong.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Rob, thank you. It came from the heart.
LikeLike
I love Gorden Lightfoot’s music! You have done a great reversal poem.
But you know once you’ve scorned, you’ll always alone!!
Well done Lisa.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Dwight! Hell hath no fury and all that, eh? lol
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yep! :>)
LikeLiked by 1 person
Narrow bridge here for love, swinging over a chasm between heart and heart. – Brendan
LikeLiked by 1 person
I know! At first you think he’s had a change of heart — until the next time…. Good catch.
LikeLike
We’d all like to hear that second voice I think, although we too often get the first. (K)
LikeLiked by 1 person
Or they say the second but do the first 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes…
LikeLiked by 1 person
A lot of guys are tight with their feelings…but I learned early the hard way…you can miss out on something if you don’t speak and keep playing a stupid game.
LikeLiked by 1 person
❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Lisa, there is a soulful voice in your response. I love it!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Linda, it came from there.
LikeLiked by 1 person
That painting is divine! I’d love to see it come to life in a movie or at a photo shoot. I’m imagining Halle Berry, Keira Knightly, Rachel Weisz…
LikeLiked by 1 person
I love it too! Yes on all 3!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Lisa,
Oh what a turnabout for the persona, from carefree to needy! You never miss the water until the well runs dry as they say.
∼🕊Dora
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Dora, yes exactly.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh would, coulda, shoulda! You don’t know how good you have it until you’ve lost it. He should have known better. Lisa, I love that you used a Gordon Lightfoot song 😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙂 Wise words and so glad you like the song.
LikeLiked by 1 person